


beloved

by strawbunnyshortcake



Series: Protag!Otonashi Ryouko - Forgotten Memories of Hope and Despair, a what-if of SDR2 [1]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa Zero, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Mentions of Death, Super Dangan Ronpa 2 Spoilers, Threats of Violence, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:01:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27318190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawbunnyshortcake/pseuds/strawbunnyshortcake
Summary: the trial came to an end, the killer was found out as tsumiki mikan.ryouko could feel burning hatred staring down at hershe really figured out who it was, right?right?(a protag ryouko fic)
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Otonashi Ryouko, Otonashi Ryouko/Tsumiki Mikan (Mentions)
Series: Protag!Otonashi Ryouko - Forgotten Memories of Hope and Despair, a what-if of SDR2 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1994401
Comments: 7
Kudos: 20





	beloved

**Author's Note:**

> this came from a conversation i had with a few people in a server i'm in about protag!ryouko in the post-trial of ch3. and thought of some angst and horror mixed along with it.
> 
> this is an au where ryouko, our forgetful student, is the protagonist during the events of super danganronpa 2; goodbye despair - where she takes hajime's place.
> 
> why's ryouko here? you'll find out soon! maybe, possibly, if i ever get to write a full fic of this whole au if i ever have the right motivation to do so.
> 
> enjoy!

" _thaaat's right! even though it's incredibly obvious right now, you've figured out the blackened once again! three times in a row! the blackened this time who killed the two poor girls was tsumiki mikan, the super high-school level nurse!_ "  
  


it was over. the class trial was finished. the nightmare was finally over and done with. and yet, ryouko felt so nauseous. her head kept itching, and itching, and _itching_ , it was uncomfortable that she tried to use the podium to keep her balance. why did it itch? why is it itching? why is it _hurting?  
_hurting? why hurting? now it just felt like she was having a growing headache - like she was kicked across her skull. it kept pounding. why can't she see? why can't she hear? is she dead? where was she? this isn't real, right?

_make it stop._  
_make it stop._  
_make it stop._  
_ma-_

" ry - ryouko, you alright there? " hinata's voice echoed through her ears, ringing in her ear-drums when she came back to reality. she slowly turned her head around, not recognizing the scenery around her. where was she again? who were these people?  
and why did she have a notebook in her hand? and why did she have drool rolling down her chin? she wiped off the drool from her face with her sleeve before opening the notebook she had.

she looked through it's pages, seeming focused. silent. reading the pages in her head as if it would help make sense in her train of thought.

...ah, now she remembered.  
tsumiki killed two people - mioda, and saionji. ryouko was able to piece together evidence to figure that out - despite the condition she has.  
she's done that two times before, this was the third time now.

ryouko blinked, closing her notebook before turning to hinata - who had an expression of concern. why is he concerned?

" hinata-kun, did you say something? " ryouko asked, seeming completely calm about it. did she hear him say something before? she forgot that too.

" you looked like you were dissociating, " hinata replied to the girl, his tone clearly showing worry, " but...you seem alright now. "

" oh, " ryouko blinked again, opening her notebook as she pulled the pencil out of the spirals of her notebook - writing down the current events. everyone looked so on edge...komaeda was the only one who stayed calm, as if this wasn't new to him at all. why is that?

" this is...a big joke, ain't it? " ryouko heard owari speak, impulsivly turning her head to see owari's figure. owari's face was blue - her expression in disbelief, and her hands were clenched up into fists.  
ryouko thought owari was always strong. why is she...?

" are you tellin' me that...tsumiki, the nurse who helped me, mioda and komaeda back to health was behind mioda and saionji's deaths..?! tsumiki, did you lie to all of us this whole time!? did you plan to murder us from the start!? "

owari's face turned red then, her hair frizzling up as if it were alive on it's own. veins would show across her knuckles.

that happened?

as everyone looked over to tsumiki, she was silent. quiet. if ryouko were to remember correctly, tsumiki laughed the whole time during the trial when she was figured out. so why was she quiet now? she was backed up in a corner, did she not have anything else to say?

" tsumiki, do - don't just stand there! say something, anything! this - this is going nowhere if you stay quiet! " kazuichi shouted through stuttering words, he wasn't nearly as brave - his pale face said it all. drained of color from fear. and tsumiki didn't say anything in return to him, which only made him shudder as if he felt a cold wind flow past his spine.

" this isn't going anywhere...she's backed up in a corner, she ain't sayin' anything, " kuzuryu crossed his arms in-front of his chest, turning his head away, trying to hide his own anger. even if everyone else can see through it, " but this is...this isn't the same tsumiki we knew, right? "

" of course not, " komaeda finally spoke up, leading to ryouko and hinata looking over at him. his expression stayed calm - and yet...  
" the tsumiki mikan we knew from the beginning is gone now - there's nothing else we can do. however, based on my predictions...she might've caught it too. "

" caught it too? you mean... " hinata's voice was quiet, face paling when that came to his own train of thought. he felt his stomach turning, twisting into a knot. he felt sick, and he hated it.

ryouko's head was beginning to itch again, bringing the uncomfortable feeling across her skull again when those words came into her mind. her nails dug in the fabric of her notebook, flipping through it's pages to try and find what he was talking about. what he brought up.  
...ah.

" you're...you're talking about the despair disease, aren't you? tsumiki-chan caught it too? " as ryouko asked that, her head tilted up away from her pages to komaeda - who seemed pretty impressed by her statement and he nodded.

" that's exactly right, otonashi-san! i'm surprised you have that written in your notebook! you must be smarter than i thought, " a smile crossed komaeda's lips when as he praised, ryouko swore her face turned blue.

" are you saying that tsumiki was infected this whole time? " tanaka kept a more calm approach when he asked that question, but sweat built up across his face with the realization at hand.

" now that both ryouko and komaeda brought that up...they could be right, " hinata's voice slightly rose away from being quiet earlier, " back at that time, her body felt really hot when she tried to wake me up that night. now thinking about it...that must've been the same high fever just like what mioda, owari and komaeda had when they first got it. "

" that would mean...because of the disease, ms. tsumiki was..? " sonia looked over at komaeda, ryouko and hinata, worry forming on her face.

" the symptoms she had...if - if this is all correct, that would mean the reason she's quiet now is because of her losing all hope and being overcome by despair, right? " ryouko flipped through the pages again when she asked that.

" yes, which would mean that tsumiki mikan isn't the same person as we knew before. because of her being infected with despair - she may as well be called super high-school level despair, right? there's a reason why she killed under the influence of despair - it was for the sake of it. isn't that right? "

as komaeda's words echoed through the walls of the trial room, ryouko stopped in her tracks. her heart felt heavy, and a sudden sensation of fear surrounded her. she didn't look at tsumiki the whole time - but even if she hadn't, she felt...the eyes of someone staring at her, burning through. her nails dug deeper into the fabric cover of her notebook when she couldn't hear anything else. her nails were ready to rip through, almost wanting to cause tears - not caring if she'd destroy it out of pain or anger. everyone was talking at once, she couldn't try to read through lips, she didn't understand what they were saying.

but everyone's on edge. were they? why is she scared? why?

what's happening?  
what's happening?

" _**why didn't you forgive me**? _"

ryouko's heart stopped when that sweet, high-pitched voice popped bubbles out of her ears. everyone's heads turned to tsumiki, some clearly terrified.  
tsumiki didn't look as sweet again. betrayal was written on her expression as eyes burned through ryouko.

" you forgave me for who i was, you accepted me for who i am, i loved you from the bottom of my heart and you felt the same, "  
" so...why didn't you forgive me? "

the soft steps of shoes got closer to ryouko, and if she could look now. the same eyes were in-front of her. they didn't look normal. it wasn't the normal-looking eyes everyone else had.  
spirals.

" was this not enough for you? am i not enough for you? did you want me dead from the start? did i do something wrong? do you hate me? "

ryouko felt the colors drain from her face as the words echoed across her head, impulsivly taking a few steps back away from the nurse.

" ge....get away from m--- "  
" or is it the fact that you _don't remember?_ "

_don't remember?_  
_don't remember what? what did she mean?_

the itching came back, but really it felt like the fingers of a skeleton were scratching into her skull - ready to tear her hair out. it was an uncomfortable feeling, and that uncomfortable feeling turned back into pain. her breathing fastened, and she didn' realize that the notebook she held had fallen out of her grip.  
what's happening to her? _what's happening to me?_

" you don't remember me, nor do you remember any of us. is that it? is this the _despair_ you craved out of me? "

ryouko felt like she was going to vomit.  
she hated this, she didn't like it, she didn't like that word. it made her head dizzy and her stomach was twisting into knots enough to try and make her sick.

...

who's in-front of her again? were they guarding her? the man in-front of her looked...angry.

" get away from her! what the hell are you talking about?! "

the brown-haired man shouted, not seeming to hesitate to raise his voice. what was happening? ryouko didn't understand when she came back to reality.  
...her head slightly hurts, why is that? she blinked when she turned her head around to process her surroundings again, until her loafer grazed against...a notebook on the floor? is this her's?

she picked it up, looking over it and opening it's pages. this has to be her's then, right?

tsumiki stayed quiet, silent, almost making anyone think she's at a loss of worse...until she laughed.

and laughed, and laughed, and laughed.

and ryouko remembered when her eyes locked onto the page. she was terrified again when tsumiki's laughter got worse and worse, louder and louder.

" th - this chick's nuts! " kazuichi pulled at his beanie, despite how cowardly he looked right now when he shouted out.

" this...isn't apart of the disease, is it? " nanami asked, admittidly shocked when small blue came to her face.

even komaeda didn't have any words at first, before shaking his head. for the first time, if ryouko looked, purple came to his features.  
" no, no this isn't...i think i was wrong. this is...different, this isn't- "

" eh! who cares about that? the girl's out of her mind - she's in full despair! this is what she wanted! "  
everyone's attention turned to monokuma who interrupted komaeda, holding some sledge hammer as monomi struggled to escape the ropes that had held her tight.

" after all, it's--- "

" punishment time? "

tsumiki interrupted monokuma's sentence, tilting her head with the widest smile across her lips.

" no, this is cruel! way too cruel! " monomi cried continuing to struggle, trying once again to escape.

" hold on a second - if tsumiki knows something about ryouko, she has to know our memories of hope's peak right? " hinata, trying to intervene, raised his voice. he crossed his arms in-front of his chest before continuing.  
" we need to know a thing or two, at-least! "

" hmmmmmmmmm? " tsumiki hummed, tilting her head to the side, almost nearly tilting her body at the same time. hinata tried not to look scared.  
" if you're wondering...you wanted to know future foundation? "

almost like she read someone's mind, tanaka immediately spoke out.  
" you know this group? could it be that you hold information of them?

" let's seee...hmmmmm... "  
tsumiki _tried_ to think, as if she was, like she took tanaka's question to account. before she smiled innocently, giggling cutely.  
" awwwww...it seems i forgot! how clumsy of me, hehe! "

ryouko felt her face pale, her nails were reaching to dig into the fabric of hinata's shirt, trying to hide behind him. she hated this, she hated it so much. hinata knew the discomfort around her, and he tried so hard not to show how angry he was. but kazuichi wasn't hiding all that well.

" oh HELL no!!! " kazuichi shrieked, pointing a finger at tsumiki despite how scared he was earlier.  
" you have GOT to know something! anything! there's no way that you just forgo- "

" jeeeeez, you guys are askin' such borin' questions! if she forgot, she forgot! " monokuma cackled, and ryouko's face turned red in a second, immediatedly forgetting the fear that twisted in her stomach.

" hey, that's not fair! " ryouko peeked out from behind hinata, pointing a finger at monokuma.  
" you can't just do something like that! tsumiki-chan has to kno-- "

" no more questions, dummy! after all, we're getting to the part everyone's been waitin' for! you don't want to get in the way, do ya? " monokuma raised his claws after that sentence, immediately sending shivers down her spine as hinata hid her behind his back again.

...

the whole time, tsumiki had been giggling, even after monokuma had slammed down the button.  
all ryouko could recall was the face tsumiki created on her expression. despair. yet with such a happy smile. hinata had to cover ryouko's eyes when the execution had started. everyone felt sick to their stomach, and even if ryouko couldn't see such a horrible fate as death, she felt her stomach twisting and turning at every corner.

she couldn't sleep the whole night either. she can't remember how, she had to read her notebook again, and she couldn't sleep again. tsumiki's words still echoed across her brain.

_why didn't you forgive me?_

what did she mean by that?  
what did she mean?  
she wanted to know the truth.

... _but did she want to know the truth?_


End file.
